Do children need labels?

I'm having a problem.

A child I know *very* well is having problems at school.
He is an able, well adjusted, polite, well mannered child.
He speaks clearly and with confidence, and is able to express his emotions.  He is happy to approach an adult for support when he trusts them and accepts the judgement of adults when given fairly.

The problem is, he just cannot get on with other children.
Somehow, in his particular class, he is just not accepted.
It seems he feels 'different' and he behaves differently.

When there is disruption in class, he feels children are 'stealing' his 'learning time'.
When given responsibility, he appears to use it to have 'power' over other children.
He does not like playing football and avoids other team games.
He finds group or team working difficult unless he is 'leader' (as long as other children do as he asks).
He can be insensitive to the feelings of children and some of the subtleties of their language, for example when a girl said "my drawing is rubbish", obviously inviting reassurance of the opposite, Percy agreed, saying "yes, it is a bit".
He is acutely 'nosey' and always comparing himself in rights and responsibilities, to other children.
He is large and uncoordinated which makes him physically different.
He can be obsessive about interests, although he can have several obsessions at the same time.
He can become very angry and have verbal outbursts when 'wound up'.

He has set himself apart from his peers because he seems to a) feel superior to them and b) not relate to them, and c) feels his efforts fall unappreciated and so therefore it is 'not worth it'.
This child has a rich and varied social calendar and has friends outside school, he simply has not adjusted to the social 'scene' within the school he currently attends, and has attended for the last 2 years.

Now the question is:
As he has many of the key attributes of Aspergers symdrome as documented in many of the incidences above, should he be labelled as such?
How many of the features described above could also be attributed to adolescence?

This shows a few 'buzz phrases' often attributed to those with Aspergers syndrome:

                                                           


Many would argue it would be better for him if he saw a paediatrician and received a diagnosis of an Autistic Spectrum Condition.  It might enable him to better understand his own strengths and weaknesses and support himself.  But his family are more than capable of supporting him with this without confirmation from a paediatrician.

Will it make him more accepted at school?
Certainly, a 'circle of friends' approach, whereby a number of children are chosen and Percy's feelings are explained, along with a brief explanation of his difficulties, might help.  The children are given an opportunity to meet with an adult regularly and, it is hoped that, by becoming closely involved in supporting that child's needs, their better understanding, and that of the child with ASC, helps them to reduce incidents of isolation or outburst.
But why does he need a label to access this kind of support, and frankly, would the support be forthcoming anyway?
Supporting children with ASC is complex for schools and much less likely to happen, unless the child's behaviour becomes disruptive or their learning is affected.  There is no academic or behavioural impact in the case of young Percy, so the school has no incentive to support him other than to help him be happier, which is not a measurable outcome in  the current Ofsted schedule.

The decision is pending.

What is a sentence, anyway?

So many children get caught trying to run before they can walk. Or, under pressure to meet increasingly ambitious developmental goals, trying to write in sentences before they can speak in sentences.

What is a sentence anyway?

"Make sure you have a capital letter at the beginning of your sentence, and a full stop at the end".  We've all been there, we've probably all either said it or had it said to us.

I think most people who have ever paid any attention to a child's early composition will have seen a neat row of dots at the end of every line of writing, regardless of it's grammatical position.

Those educated in the dim and distant 1980's, like myself, will remember very little formal grammar. It simply wasn't taught beyond nouns, verbs and adjectives.

It's not that I don't use grammar, it is just very difficult to understand the terminology. I know when it's there and can spot when it isn't, but I couldn't explain a past participle if my life depended upon it.
My understanding of grammar is implicit.  It has never been explicit.

With the new curriculum focus on SPAG, grammar is hot again.  It is even tested in year 6.  Eek!

To clarify: In order to be a sentence, a group of words must have a subject and a predicate (which could be an action).   'The dog is sitting' is a simple sentence.  It can be made more complex with the addition of adjectives or subordinate clauses, but the subject and the predicate must remain.

So, how on Earth can we make grammar accessible to children in the early stages of formal language acquisition or with language impairment, for those children for whom grammar is not being picked up naturally?
In practise, these are the children who find it difficult to answer simple questions with more than a single word, or use basic statements to express wants and needs.
"Miss, need toilet."

I was lucky enough to spend some time with a very talented Speech and Language Therapist who was supporting a child in my class. She introduced me to Shape Coding, designed and introduced by Susan Ebbels, which you can learn about here. 

As a teacher, I need to help children speak in sentences in order for them to write in sentences.

Shape coding makes this possible in a simple, visual format.

What is learned naturally for most people, has to be taught explicitly to children with Language Disorders.
What I have found is that the large majority of children in our current world of moving on very quickly from skill to skill, also benefit from a bit of explicit teaching.  I have seen that taking Shape Coding a little farther and using it to support children's writing, can have dramatic positive effects.  Importantly, children can see their own success and begin to self-assess.
A shape for each part of the sentence means we can help children to see how to improve their sentence composition and consequently, their writing.  I have seen children write a relevant string of sentences with nouns, verbs, adjectives  and conjunctions correctly, wheras they may have previously struggled to write a few words or indeed form a complete sentence verbally.

I love it when something works.

All behaviour is communication.

Hearing that phrase for the first time was a lightbulb moment for me.
No child WANTS to misbehave, of course they don't.  Why would they?
This phrase is one of the key principles of the nurture philosophy, first advanced by Marjorie Boxhall and now underpinning a national movement which you can read more about here. This statement has so much power, it changed my approach to managing behaviour permanently.
It draws me back to basic needs, what do we need for survival?
What happens when those basic needs are not met?
When a baby cries, is he misbehaving?
 As a new parent I frantically tried every option possible before finally hitting the jackpot, learning quickly that, in the case of both my boys, they were usually crying because they were hungry.  I attended to their needs and they stopped crying.  Together, we learned how to respond to one another, they eventually learned to communicate their needs effectively.
No more crying baby.
 So simple looking back, but so stressful at the time.
I got it wrong, changed a nappy or waved a rattle in front of them when they simply wanted to sleep, they showed this by crying louder, longer and harder.  I soon learned.
So, generally we have no problem in understanding that negative behaviour is communication for babies.
Where does it all go wrong?  Why do some children continue with negative behaviour?
It would be simplistic to state that all poor behaviour expressed by children of school age is because their Mum didn't change their nappy quickly enough when they were a baby, but in very simple terms, the reciprocal relationship established between child and carer is absolutely crucial to the development of the skills needed to cope with supply and demand throughout life.  Marjorie Boxhall was primarily discussing children with Attachment Disorder, stemming from a problem in the reciprocal relationship above.
All too often however, other factors interfere with a child getting what they need to feel secure. Feeling secure is crucial to development, as explained by Maslow in his Hierarchy of Need. Without security, it is difficult to form higher order skills like regulation and self-esteem.
Children with Language Disorders and delays often struggle to fit behavioural expectations in the classroom.  Perhaps they struggle for words to express their frustration because they have not developed a sufficient vocabulary.
How do you explain frustration without using the word?
An enormous number of children with whom I have had the pleasure of working are restricted in their emotional vocabulary to 'happy' and 'sad'.
Developing a stronger expressive vocabulary and ensuring children have the opportunity to use it is essential to moving them out of a behavioural rut.  Looking at pictures and discussing the feelings of people in them, giving the child scenarios and modelling or scripting their choices in order to provide an 'escape route' should they find themselves in a similar situation can help here.
All to often, the child who has repeatedly been sent in at playtime because they have hit another child, stops this behaviour once they have been taught the skills to communicate their frustration and given the opportunity to do so.  We usually learn that the 'victim' was not so innocent after all!
Communication, of course, can be non-verbal and everyone's interpretation of the world around them is different.
I referred earlier to my own education at the hands of my eldest son as I wrongly waved a rattle in front of his face only to find it made him cry even more. 'Over stimulated' cried my sister, a very experienced Super Mum, whom I called for advice every time A squeaked.
Again, most children can successfully integrate their world on a sensory level by the time they reach school, but for many, a need to calm by withdrawing from sensory input is necessary throughout primary school.  Sensory overload may lead to behavioural outbursts, repetitive behaviours such as rocking, anger or aggression.  In order to combat, we may learn behaviour to help us calm.  I bite my nails. Disgusting habit, I know.  Unfortunately, children often learn behaviours which are negative, sometimes criminal. Perhaps from role models whom are less than ideal.  Does this mean they are innately bad?
There's a whole can of worms opened right there....
The first step to successful behaviour management is to find out what the child is trying to communicate, what is the source of their frustration?  What is stopping them from functioning?  Has negative behaviour been successful for them in the past, thus becoming 'learned' so the child is now receiving mixed messages and is, as a consequence confused and simply does not understand expectations?
Poor behaviour is a cry for help, it is our duty as adults to listen.

Round Holes and Square Pegs

Hello and welcome to Square Pegs!

The intention of this blog is to offer pragmatic advice to parents, teachers and, frankly, anyone interested in children and their development.
I am a teacher, I am also a Mum.  I help children every day.  This does not make me qualified to advise anyone, I know.  That is not the intention here.  A simple Google search can provide all manner of information about every aspect of education and child development, Special Educational Needs and teaching strategies.
The problem I hope to address is that children cannot be categorised.
The problem is that policy makers and Google do not know THIS child. 
It can be difficult to relate academic papers, helpful information sheets, and the advice of healthcare and education professionals to a person.
That is my job.
I currently teach an intervention group in a mainstream school for children who are, for a very large variety of reasons, not 'getting on' with mainstream teaching.  These are the children who do not 'fit' the mould.  With the polarisation of teaching techniques and prescription of educational method to unprecedented levels, I can see increased panic in educational settings about children who stubbornly hold on to their individuality and refuse to 'fit'. I'm here to celebrate those children, to advocate for them and to help find a way for this success to be celebrated too. 
If we stretch the 'square peg' metaphor a little further, in order to make the square peg fit the round hole, we risk chipping away at the form itself.
I firmly believe that our wonderful, unique and eccentric children should remain just that and that our educational establishments should have the flexibility to fit around and include them, to celebrate these children in all their quirky joy and that in that, we foster happiness.  Essential to success.
I have been teaching for 20 years now and in that time have met thousands of children.  Every single one of those children had a different approach to learning.  Every single one of them is unique.  I would never be so bold as to claim that every single one has made amazing educational leaps under my tutelage, that would be ridiculous, but I have learned something from every child I have met and I am able to draw on that experience to support children every day.  Where I cannot support them myself, I can help parents and teachers to understand and interpret the advice and minefield of recommendations available and tailor support to individuals.
That is my aim.  To share my experience. Simples.